Female nudists need a community of their own

now, I’m not a separatist Feminist, but I do know that in certain situations having men around can make women uncomfortable exploring or trying new things, or discussing topics that are important to be discussed.  In a perfect world these things wouldn’t be taboo for men or women, and could be discussed as a society.  But with the societal constraints we have, approaching nudism as a woman is difficult.

 That is not to say that with our societal constraints approaching nudism as a man is easy, But there are far more male than female nudists, and I can only speak from my perspective.

Women are brought up to see themselves as objects and tools for men’s gratification.  (Even men are brought up to see women this way.)  I know that this is does not apply to 100% of the population, but to some extents our culture tells us this.  look at any magazine, or at pop icons.  Just because there are a few exceptions doesn’t mean the problem isn’t there, or that it’s ok to ignore it.  But I digress…

 If you are a woman interested in nudism, and you go to a beach or a resort, you will be getting naked in front of men.  These same men that you were taught will objectify you, and who will drool over you.  The men that society tells us cannot control themselves if a woman wears a skirt that is too short.  And we’re expected to simply forget society and happily prance about?

It takes time, and courage.  I only go down to the beach when I have male protectors.  Men that I know will keep the creeps away (because it is a public place men who think it is ok to objectify women troll the beach looking for women to stare at and sometimes (though rarely) even jack off to).  I’ve never been to a resort, but I would not go alone the first time even though the pervs are screened out.  I would not feel comfortable.

 It would be utterly fantastic to have a place to go to be naked where I could feel safe.  I feel safe on the beach if my friends are there, but I want to feel unconditionally safe.  I think it would be great to have talks about society and self perception.  What is expected of the female body, and what is the reality?  Let us accept and embrace that reality! 

Once more comfortable with our bodies and ourselves, I think it would be easier to happily prance at resorts with people of all genders. 

 One more comment.  Before anyone says this is reverse sexism and we should allow men,  This is about creating a space for women to join an already existing community.  Not a community completely separate from men. 

Advertisements

Menstruation is Good

I’m not being sarcastic.   It is good for the body and reminds me that I am woman with all that comes with it.  

I am currently menstrating so it is on my mind a bit.  I really wish I could shake the world by it’s shoulders and get it to realise that a monthly flow is not gross. ProFeministe Male supports me leaving my vagina as is, but the industry doesn’t.

I mean without this function none of us would be here. my vagina is clean and smells like a vagina. I use a diva cup because it is tidier and doesn’t cause tss. no string hanging down to carry bacteria up inside me.  Occasionally if I don’t want anything inside of me I will use a pad.  I’m hoping to get Glad Rags so that I’m not adding to landfills when I do that.

Just two days ago I was running into problems that people have because I admit to bleeding about once a month. I was a bit worried because I was late, (not so late I was freaking out and heading to the pharmacy, esp since I use spermacidically lubricated condoms) and I mentioned this to a male friend. He freaked. we were in public! his main concern? “Keep your voice down!” So I did what any immature recently out of college youth would do: I continued talking about vaginas and menstration. I even called out “menstration” after him at one point when we were leaving a gellato place in china town SF. Most of the comments weren’t that graphic, such as, “I need to hang out with menstrating women, my body is really sensitive to syncing up with other people”

If you are a girl and you are reading this and think that anything I’ve said is gross, or I’m crazy to mention menstration to a guy. Let me tell you:

Your body is fine. Your vagina is wonderful. Your vagina is beautiful.

 You do not need to lemon scent it, you do not need to hide it’s monthly flows. It is how it should be.

do not be afraid to touch it, or have it touched (lovingly).

it is not dirty. It is the place from which life springs. It is the place from which orgasms spring. Rejoice.

You are wonderful.