this is what I don’t get

some excerpts from a post my friend wrote about a conversation he had:

Pointing to the flowers on my table while I was working and then pointing at my computer he stated, ‘See this and see this? They are different and should be treated different. I wouldn’t water the computer.’ ‘See this,’ he said as he went for a stack of my business cards and began laying each one side by side. ‘They are the same – not the flowers and the computer but the cards.’ ‘We can’t treat them all the same if they are different.’

I stopped working and looked at my friend. I said they are the same and they are different and that when you really get down to it they are all made up of energy and matter… it’s all the same by then. No you would not water my computer or water my cards, but they all have value. Diversity and differences don’t mean that discrimination is necessary. They must all be cared for differently, but not treated with any less respect. The flower has value because it is a flower and we can appreciate that. It is different but not less than a computer. The business cards while each is almost identical will each serve out its own unique purpose that even while I may guide – I cannot control the outcome.

now, I think he tagged me so I would read it. I think he wants me to be more patient with people who say bigoted things. I think I’m as patient as I can be. I am willing to point out to people when they are being bigoted but I don’t have the time or energy to spoon feed them the information. Then pat them on the hand and say “its ok I know its so hard to deal with privilege.. you poor poor thing.”

I need to build my own community so I can feel safe. I want to be able to relax occasionally and not have to worry that on my day off someone is going to make a joke about forcing a penis into some orfice on a woman. (or whatever the hate that day)

but what really gets me. How can someone write the above be the same person who every time we mention food has to tell me how he “needs” his “bloody steak” (or other animal flesh).

they are the same and they are different and that when you really get down to it they are all made up of energy and matter… it’s all the same by then. No you would not water my computer or water my cards, but they all have value.

We are all different, all of us, each of us. None of us WANT to be discriminated against, none of us want to be less than, none of us want to be beaten, abused, harassed, killed, shamed, disrespected… NONE of us… none of us. (I began to tear up and paused for a moment.) We all – ALL of us – want love, and to be loved, and respected and at the very least left alone to live our lives freely.

except for the things it IS ok to kill. it is ok to consume the products of rape and of torture and of murder. because those lives are only there for our consumption. those lives only have value to us for what we can get from them.

The flower has value because it is a flower and we can appreciate that. It is different but not less than a computer.

I have value in the male gaze as an object. I can be beautiful as a flower and be appreciated. but that is not who I am or respect how I want to be treated. as the Dude said in the Big Lebowski “he treats objects like women, man” the comparison just doesn’t work.

yes partly I’m ranting because I’m still mad about everything else. And this note feels like it is supposed to be a lesson to me. I have been patient with the liberal bullshit. but I just can’t take the bigots anymore. because to them, liberal seems to mean, “I pretend I’m joking when I say bigoted things instead of saying them out right, then claim I’m pushing the envelope.”

I don’t want to work for equality with those groups because the I don’t want a world with their type of equality. Where we are all equal but some are more equal than others. I want to build a community that is loving and kind and supportive. I want a community based on personal responsibility. based on love.

I will just build a better life
where we will never feel the need
to chop down any kind of tree
or topple over gifts wrapped up in paper
I would like to see
stockings stuffed with things I can use
tips to prevent domestic abuse
all I want for christmas are the blueprints of community

my different friend’s friend’s band wrote that. fuck yeah.

Peaceful Protest for the Day of Decision

If you are in San Diego, please meet at 6th and Laurel at 5pm on whatever day the supreme court decides the case about prop 8.

we will march either in celebration or in protest.

for more info see the facebook group

not in san diego? Check out http://www.equalitycentral.org/decision-day

Like I said. I know I might be pissed… we can gather angrily but peacefully to raise our voices against hatred and oppression.

Unless of course prop 8 is overturned. then it will be party!!!

Tell everyone you know! We need to “Come out” in force!

I’m afraid my screams give no voice to the silenced

I sent the following as an email to all my friends in the states:  

I got the heads up about this from here.

“On Monday, President Bush appointed Dr. Susan Orr as Acting Deputy Assistant Secretary for Population Affairs (a Health and Human Services Agency), placing Orr in charge of the nation’s family planning activities under Title X. In the past, Orr has applauded efforts to exclude birth control from health coverage for federal employees, stating that “fertility is not a disease,” and encouraged efforts to withdraw approval of RU-486.

Orr previously worked as an associate commissioner in the Administration for Children and Families, as well as for the anti-contraception and anti-reproductive rights Family Research Council. ”

That is to say that the person incharge of “Family planning” is opposed to the only known way of decreasing the abortion rate.  (which is access to birth control )

If you are Pro-Life, she is against the only known means of reducing the abortion rate and therefore against you.

If you are Pro-choice and/or think women should have reproductive rights, she is against you.

Please take a moment to sign the Planned Parenthood Pettition .

Thank you,

xxxxxxxxxxxx

feel free to copy and share or just share. I’m happy to get the message out.

of course this comes at a time when even democrats are continuing abstinence only sex ed. GAAHHHH!!!!  I could just scream.

update on Planned Parenthood Aurora

In reference to my earlier post
Firstly there is up to date info at
 http://ppaurora.blogspot.com/

There was a post this morning.  It basically said, yes they can legally throw the people off their property:

that the only way we can remove the protesters is to get Safeway/Dominick’s to send a letter to the city telling them they don’t want the protesters on their private property.

So in calling in we should Request they write a letter the the city.

My personal Addendum is that when complaining, inform them that the objectional behavior is the intimidation tactics. These protesters are Taking people’s pictures and wrtiting down their liscense plate numbers. they Are harrassing patients. Yes this is technically legal, but it is unkind, and hurtful. Even if those you speak call themselves “pro-life” it is important to note that Planned Parenthood does more than “just abortions” they offer mamograms, and pap smears and information. What could be more pro-life than ensuring that women of all economic backgrounds have access to healthcare?

Please call both the local Store and Corporate.

Dominick’s store: 630-236-0683

National Safeway Corporation’s VP for Public Affairs : 925-467-3000

The Store in Questions is:

The Dominick’s/Safeway store in question is at 3025 E. New York St, Aurora, Ill. 60504.

Vons/Safeway/Dominicks is anti-choice

Well i found out through Feministing:

Safeway hosting anti-choicers in Aurora
Having lost their appeal to the Aurora city council to shut down the new Planned Parenthood clinic, the antis have set up shop on private property — specifically the parking lot of a Dominick’s/Safeway grocery store — adjacent to the clinic. Of course, photographing women and license plates outside of abortion providers is not exactly a novel anti-choice tactic. But this time they’re not standing on public sidewalks.

As a private business, Dominick’s/Safeway could throw them off the premises and make them stop this intimidation. So call Safeway corporate and ask that the Aurora location do just that:

1-877-SAFEWAY(1-877-723-3929)
Monday to Friday 9 a.m. to 9 p.m, Local Time
Saturday and Sunday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Local Time

The Dominick’s/Safeway store in question is at 3025 E. New York St, Aurora, Ill. 60504.

UPDATE: Folks in comments are saying they’re having better luck with this number for Safeway corporate offices in Pleasanton: 925-467-3000 .

Please call the corporate offices. The lady I talked to was shocked that this was happening and said she is calling their district manager. I’m not shopping at safeway or any safeway owned businesses until this is resolved. Please join me standing up for choice. Vote with your dollar and let them know that they have lost a customer if this continues.

again the number for Safeway corporate offices in Pleasanton is 925-467-3000